The Friday After

Today is the Friday after. I remember that first night. I don't think I slept at all and if I did, it was only moments of being unconscious. I remember the pain, never ending pain. I remember crying so much I had to take Advil because my eyes hurt. I remember be in a state of shock. I can't imagine what it must be like for people to go through it alone. I don't drink or do drugs or do prescription medication so I had nothing to mask or hide the pain. I had to feel every painful second. The Friday after was a blur to me now. That first day. I just remember a lot of people being around me coming and going from the house.

Now I have another Friday After. The pain is gone or only something that is felt on occasionally. I have a plan today. I'm going to clean the house with a help from a friend. I still have a ton of medical supplies that need to be thrown out. I want to take a bunch of stuff to Goodwill. I'm going to pick out a color to paint the bedroom and paint it. I'm going to paint my bedroom today. Some of you know but most do not that Carol was going to paint the bedroom. She was playing around with a color and painted, "Carol Loves Kelly" on the wall in the bedroom. It's hard to see because the colors almost match. You have to really look for it to see it. Something in me has not wanted to paint over that. There is some kind of comfort in seeing that every day. But it's time. I'm ready.

This is my year now. Tomorrow I have plans and will share it with everyone then. Until then, take care and have a great day!

Kel